Day 6: Make or build something with your hands. From knitting to making a table

He doesn’t know this and I didn’t send this to him for approval (please don’t be angry), but this activity is inspired by and dedicated to my brother. Tomas has been through a different kind of loss, and that is the loss of a big part of himself. Tomas was on a flight from Taipei to Canada when my dad fell into a coma, he got to Nanaimo and we told him he had to come now. He did. I don’t think my dad wanted his biggest fan to see him lying in bed so he did what he thought was best, and died a few hours before Tomas landed. This was August 2005 and since then my brother has had a long and far from easy journey dealing with anxiety and panic attacks (something that I think A LOT of us feel but don’t call them by their name!). During this time I’ve had to witness my always unbelievable brother go through very dark periods and doubt his own self and how amazing he is.

Tomas has always been artistic and putting things together and breaking them apart has always fascinated him… so he studied business and ecommerce and, for a while, buried that part of himself. A few years ago Tomas started creating things again, building things, making up stuff and taking it apart. Having been to his house for two christmases now I was able to see how good this has been for his mental health (and mine!). Last time I was there we made this chopping board together, from selecting what wood to use from scraps he had there, to putting our names in the back. Making that board was amazing, we used fun tools, I got to see my brother as a teacher, we were able to spend quality time together away from screens and the outside world and I now have the world’s most amazing chopping board.

Tomas is far from a perfect human, but he is my perfect brother (even with all the fighting in our lives). I love seeing him again in all his glory, with the occasional scar from battle, but that just makes him more wonderful.

I’m not doing a chopping board today, but I am doing some cross stitching. That useless activity I was taught in school saved my mental health and potentially a part of my life after Olivia died. I LOVE the sharp focus you need, the clear mind with no worries except what colour goes in what square, and the sense of progress you get as you see the picture coming together. I hope you get to build something amazing today, and I also hope you have a brother (by blood or a chosen one) as life changing as mine is. Te amo Tomate!